Devils in Disguise

As I was walking into work this morning, I saw the strangest thing. There were three women walking across the street over to the crosswalk where I was waiting for the light to change. I kid you not, these women were like three real-life Charlie's Angels, minus the karate kicks and dangling from helicopters . It was fa-reaky! One was tall and blond, one slightly shorter with reddish brown hair, and the other one was Asian with long, glossy black hair. They all had ridiculously stylish and trendy outfits on, complete with skyscraping boots, and of course their bodies were all perfect. They were talking and laughing, throwing their heads back so that all of their perfect hair flowed perfectly in the perfect morning breeze. Perfect! I seriously think the air around them suspended them in slow motion so that everyone else could appreciate their utter fabulousness! All I could think was, "Please go the other way! Please don't come over here to my corner! Let's not call attention to the fact that I am so NOT a Charlie's Angel!" But of course, they managed to float up behind me and give passing drivers just enough time to look at our little group and wonder, "Which of these things is not like the others?"

I was alone at the intersection of Goddesses and Supermodels! The Mimi (from the Drew Carey show) to their Cameron, Drew, and Lucy! I swear that stoplight must have been broken because it seemed like an eternity before it changed and the little white crosswalk guy signaled my sweet release from the agony of embarrassment. Thank you, Little White Crosswalk Guy! I will never forget what you did for me! I maneuvered my short, stubby legs as fast as they would carry me across the street and into my building. Dashed into the elevator, and climbed further and further away from my impromptu Rosie O'Donnell-esque catwalk (okay, crosswalk) appearance on Denver's Next Top Model.

I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and gosh darnit, people like me!