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Thursday, January 11, 2007

2006 Summary

This is probably posted a little bit past the expected "reflection period" for the new year, but I kinda like doing things on my own terms again...

1. What did you do in 2006 that you’d never done before?

Put myself first, and continued to put the needs of someone else first, though I'm sure they didn't realize it: I got a divorce. I moved to a small town - on purpose. I worked for my mom and we both lived to tell the tale, and it was a good experience.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

No, I did not, and no, I have not. I'm very much not in resolution mode, which is weird because usually I crank out enough to fill up an entire notebook. But my resolutions are usually about the same ol' things I hate about myself that keep getting recycled, and this year? This year I don't want to point out the things to myself that I don't like, and kinda just want to enjoy the things I do like, instead. For once.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Nope. Most importantly, I DID NOT. AND THAT IS GOOD.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No one close to me, but close to people that I love insanely.

5. What countries did you visit?

Zilch. Still haven't been able to check "go to a foreign country" off of the yearly list. I am really hoping to take care of that this year.

6. What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?

Bedroom furniture that I actually like. Arms that won't look like Christmas hams in sleeveless shirts. Hair that doesn't piss me off on a daily basis. No more ridiculously huge truck payment that is BIGGER THAN ONE ENTIRE PAYCHECK. Yeah. That's a big one.

7. What dates from 2006 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

July 28th, October 14th, October 17th, October 18th, October 27th - two of those days were the ends of eras, one date was the start of a new one, one date was the anniversary of an era begun last year, and one date marked the most significant - and sad - change in the life of that someone I love. A change that I know about all too well. Kinda looks like October was a big month.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Easy. My divorce. And I don't mean it in a vindictive way at all. We weren't right for each other, I saw it, he supposedly saw it, and I finally just did something about it. We are both better off and we will BOTH be happier, and for that, I pat myself on the back. I worked tirelessly for four-and-a-half years for my ex's happiness, and now he will have it, even if it means he has to hate me for it. Most importantly, I now know what it means to be happy again, too.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Definitely easy. I completely and totally destroyed an extremely important friendship based on a split-second decision of foolishness, and I have to live with the fact that I hurt this person the way that I did. I think about her and what I did to her every single day, and the pain of knowing I forced someone out of my life due to my own jackassery is a load I will shoulder forever.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

No.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

The Tru Ceramic Pro flatiron from an infomercial. IT. ROCKS.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

My family's. Without their strength to lean on in absolutely the hardest of times, I don't know where I would be.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

My own. Cowardice gets you nowhere.

14. Where did most of your money go?

HAHA. I'd answer this, but I'm laughing too hard. BIG. GOLD. DODGE.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

First kisses that completely obliterate everything you ever thought was exhilarating about first kisses.

16. Compared to this time last year, are you:

a) happier or sadder? Infinitely happier. On every single level.
b) thinner or fatter? Scarily, the same. To the pound.
c) richer or poorer? Poorer in terms of money, but trying to work on it. Richer in every other area.

17. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Been in the sun more. Ridden my bike. Hiked, camped - basically just been outdoors more.

18. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Crying. Obsessing. Comfort-eating. Analyzing.

19. Did you fall in love in 2006?

Oh, my God, yes.

20. How many one-night stands?

None.

21. What was your favorite TV program?

The Office, My Name is Earl, and Medium - back when I watched TV.

22. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

No.

23. What was the best book you read?

I wish I had something really intellectually impressive to list...I devoured a lot of Jennifer Weiner books, and ridiculously loved those.

24. What was your greatest musical discovery?

LUCACRIS. How, how, HOW did I not know about the wonder of Luda??? I love his music probably more than a 31 year-old should.

25. What did you want and get?

Myself back.

26. What did you want and not get?

A way out of the truck payments from hell.

27. What was your favorite film of this year?

Can't really say I have a stand-out. I'm a big movie freak, but I can't think of one that just rocked me to the core.

28. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 31, and I'd like to say I can remember, but apparently Alzheimer's sets in around age 31. If I have an inkling, I'd say a family member probably stepped in to make an otherwise probably-shitty birthday a bit less shitty. Put it this way: I am insanely in love with birthdays. I love them. And I can't remember the last time I loved one of mine.

29. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Staying at my old job long enough to partake in one final, sweet-ass bonus.

30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?

I discovered I have a love for t-shirts with skulls on them. Who knew? So. Skull Chick, I guess. And a new, unbridled love for pink.

31. What kept you sane?

FAMILY. FRIENDS. FAMILY. FRIENDS. FAMILY. FRIENDS.

32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

"Fancy" is not a word I would choose, but God, I'm embarrassed to say: probably Britney Spears. Because watching her make a series of spectacularly bad decisions, in a public atmosphere (and many of them involving full-on crotch nakedness! Does no one know how to properly exit a car with a skirt on?), made me feel smugly better about my own bad decisions made in my own little world.

33. Who did you miss?

A father I was lucky enough to have known, and a father I was unlucky never to have known.

34. Who was the best new person you met?

The Sean.

35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006.

It is extremely painful to look in the mirror every day and not know who you are because you are so busy being someone else, for someone else. The only thing that hurts worse is to look into the eyes of the people who knew who you were and realize that they are also wondering what happened to you.

36. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

From Sugarland's "Stand Back Up":

I've been beaten up and bruised,
I've been kicked right off my shoes,
Been down on my knees more times than you'd believe,
When the darkness tries to get me,
There's a light that just won't let me,
It might take my pride, and my tears may fill my eyes,
But I'll stand back up,

I've weathered all these storms,
But I just turn them into wind, so I can fly,
What don't kill you makes you stronger,
When I take my last breath,
That's when I'll just give up...

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